Hello again. Today is my deadline day and I have four stories to finish. But I just felt like writing in my blog. You see, I can't sleep last night.. which is weird because I went to the gym yesterday, exercised like mad, went to the sauna and steam bath.. usually, I get really, really tired and sleep like a baby on my gym days. But I fell asleep while watching 'Malcolm in the Middle' last night, woke up at around 12-ish.. and I just couldn't go back to sleep.
Truth is, I felt so so lonely last night. I kept thinking of the sweet kisses I've tasted, the hugs I've received and the sweet messages that I used to get. My phone was very quiet last night (apart from the sms I received from Leila). I actually miss the bastard who dumped me like two weeks ago... and I miss my sweetie.. (Is it possible to miss TWO guys at one time?)
Yup -- I stopped getting sweet messages from one particular bastard about two weeks ago. Sometimes, I don't know whether it's good or bad - for things to happen this way. You see, he was such a sweet talker, a passionate kisser and a real charmer.. (I guess, all bastards are like that anyway..). Despite knowing that he was seeing someone else (or rather, 'fancies' someone else), I found myself waiting anxiously for his sms-es and looked forward to his kisses.
Well, after four months of flirting with each other and six long sessions of kissing and hugging, he finally stopped sms-ing me. And you know what? I miss him. I really do.
I guess.. sometimes, you've got to meet the occassional bastards in your life. Only then would you appreciate the one who loves you and adores you..
I really felt like a slut when the bastard left me. I still wince whenever I think of his kisses and touches, and am still wondering whether he was actually thinking of someone else while we doing 'stuff' together. I felt like a total loser.. and now that I finally know what it feels like to be 'dumped', I don't think I can bear going through another relationship again.
Being dumped also made me think more about my 'sweetie'. I now realise that it was my fault that we drifted apart. I just didn't know how to react or to make any effort to save the love. And now that it's gone, I know that all the 'should-haves' in the world will never bring hm back to me. But you know what? I now know that he loves me (or rather, cares so much for me). I know I was the most important thing in his life when we were together and he made me feel so appreciated. It was me who never told him how much he meant to me, and it was me who never pampered him with attention.
Oh well, at least I've actually let it off my chest. It's not like I'm actually feeling much better (though it's out of my chest), but I guess, I was hoping that someone would tell my 'sweetie' how much he means to me... haha.. wishful thinking lah, kan? I mean, who'd dare to tell that man that I care for him still... :o)
Okay la.. enough jottings for the day. Till later.. In the meantime, I think I'll just keep myself busy with 'lustful' thoughts of the bastard.. Oh how I miss his wild and passionate kisses! Oh la la...
Truth is, I felt so so lonely last night. I kept thinking of the sweet kisses I've tasted, the hugs I've received and the sweet messages that I used to get. My phone was very quiet last night (apart from the sms I received from Leila). I actually miss the bastard who dumped me like two weeks ago... and I miss my sweetie.. (Is it possible to miss TWO guys at one time?)
Yup -- I stopped getting sweet messages from one particular bastard about two weeks ago. Sometimes, I don't know whether it's good or bad - for things to happen this way. You see, he was such a sweet talker, a passionate kisser and a real charmer.. (I guess, all bastards are like that anyway..). Despite knowing that he was seeing someone else (or rather, 'fancies' someone else), I found myself waiting anxiously for his sms-es and looked forward to his kisses.
Well, after four months of flirting with each other and six long sessions of kissing and hugging, he finally stopped sms-ing me. And you know what? I miss him. I really do.
I guess.. sometimes, you've got to meet the occassional bastards in your life. Only then would you appreciate the one who loves you and adores you..
I really felt like a slut when the bastard left me. I still wince whenever I think of his kisses and touches, and am still wondering whether he was actually thinking of someone else while we doing 'stuff' together. I felt like a total loser.. and now that I finally know what it feels like to be 'dumped', I don't think I can bear going through another relationship again.
Being dumped also made me think more about my 'sweetie'. I now realise that it was my fault that we drifted apart. I just didn't know how to react or to make any effort to save the love. And now that it's gone, I know that all the 'should-haves' in the world will never bring hm back to me. But you know what? I now know that he loves me (or rather, cares so much for me). I know I was the most important thing in his life when we were together and he made me feel so appreciated. It was me who never told him how much he meant to me, and it was me who never pampered him with attention.
Oh well, at least I've actually let it off my chest. It's not like I'm actually feeling much better (though it's out of my chest), but I guess, I was hoping that someone would tell my 'sweetie' how much he means to me... haha.. wishful thinking lah, kan? I mean, who'd dare to tell that man that I care for him still... :o)
Okay la.. enough jottings for the day. Till later.. In the meantime, I think I'll just keep myself busy with 'lustful' thoughts of the bastard.. Oh how I miss his wild and passionate kisses! Oh la la...
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