i'M nOt gEtTinG aNy yOuNgER..
Ruth and I had tea on Sunday, and as usual, we were talking about life. Yes, LIFE. Nothing major, we were just wondering if our lives would change much next year.
"He wants us to get married in March," she said.
"Oh.. does this mean we can't hang out like this anymore?" I asked, devouring the yummylicious banana split at Secr*et Reci*pe.
"Errr... maybe we can.. I think." She replied.
"Don't you want to settle down too?" She asked, after a moment of silence.
"I do.. hopefully, before I hit 30," I replied.
Scary kan.. Both of us are hitting 30 in two years. If we had it our way, we'd want to be 'mid-twenties' forever. We're enjoying ourselves so much.. no strings attached.. we're free to do whatever we want.
I'm quite contented with life at the moment. I can go to the gym whenever I feel like I need to workout, I can just call up a friend and get him or her to accompany me for dinner or a drink, I can watch a movie even if it means watching it alone.
"The problem with us is that we have very strong foundation. We're close to our families and friends, resulting in us not needing anyone else in our lives, particularly men," Ruth pondered.
It's true, I guess. But that doesn't change the fact that sooner or later, we have got to grow up and start our own family, kan? Unless of course, we choose to live with our siblings and their family. Or simply live alone.
Which is something that I cannot bear, really. I'm so dependent, in that sense. I need lots of affection and attention, and I need people to be around me most of the time. And yes, I want someone who loves me exclusively. Someone whom I can turn to at the end of the day.
Sigh. How now?
Would it be a different story if I were to start a family with someone I love? But that's not possible, kan? The two men that I really love with all my heart are waaaaayyy beyond reach. One's married (and would never want to spend his life with me, even if I agree to be his second wife), while the other is so in love with his girlfriend that he wouldn't even want to be with anyone else.
Actually, I wouldn't mind spending my life with two other men.. but they're non-Malays. Am I so 'fried' or what? One's a Chinese (and he is sitting next to me as I write this) and the other is an Indian.. But of course, they both can't marry me lah kan?
Sigh.
"Nyah.. beggars can't be choosers." Now why do I keep hearing Syah's voice saying that in my head?
ps./ Hmmm.. 'Mr President' is back from Frankfurt..
Ruth and I had tea on Sunday, and as usual, we were talking about life. Yes, LIFE. Nothing major, we were just wondering if our lives would change much next year.
"He wants us to get married in March," she said.
"Oh.. does this mean we can't hang out like this anymore?" I asked, devouring the yummylicious banana split at Secr*et Reci*pe.
"Errr... maybe we can.. I think." She replied.
"Don't you want to settle down too?" She asked, after a moment of silence.
"I do.. hopefully, before I hit 30," I replied.
Scary kan.. Both of us are hitting 30 in two years. If we had it our way, we'd want to be 'mid-twenties' forever. We're enjoying ourselves so much.. no strings attached.. we're free to do whatever we want.
I'm quite contented with life at the moment. I can go to the gym whenever I feel like I need to workout, I can just call up a friend and get him or her to accompany me for dinner or a drink, I can watch a movie even if it means watching it alone.
"The problem with us is that we have very strong foundation. We're close to our families and friends, resulting in us not needing anyone else in our lives, particularly men," Ruth pondered.
It's true, I guess. But that doesn't change the fact that sooner or later, we have got to grow up and start our own family, kan? Unless of course, we choose to live with our siblings and their family. Or simply live alone.
Which is something that I cannot bear, really. I'm so dependent, in that sense. I need lots of affection and attention, and I need people to be around me most of the time. And yes, I want someone who loves me exclusively. Someone whom I can turn to at the end of the day.
Sigh. How now?
Would it be a different story if I were to start a family with someone I love? But that's not possible, kan? The two men that I really love with all my heart are waaaaayyy beyond reach. One's married (and would never want to spend his life with me, even if I agree to be his second wife), while the other is so in love with his girlfriend that he wouldn't even want to be with anyone else.
Actually, I wouldn't mind spending my life with two other men.. but they're non-Malays. Am I so 'fried' or what? One's a Chinese (and he is sitting next to me as I write this) and the other is an Indian.. But of course, they both can't marry me lah kan?
Sigh.
"Nyah.. beggars can't be choosers." Now why do I keep hearing Syah's voice saying that in my head?
ps./ Hmmm.. 'Mr President' is back from Frankfurt..
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home