sEdiH..

Syah said something tadi. About friendship.

"You notice tak.. last year, kita berbuka dengan a different set of friends. Now, we hang out with different people. Who knows who we will be hanging out with next Ramadan," he said.

It's so true.

Ingat lagi, last year, it was me, Zuls, Syah, Jots and Nels yang selalu get-together for buka puasa. So best. We would either eat kat rumah Syah.. or gi Sri Harta*mas and it was oh so fun! Funnily, everyone seemed to have their own problems... (I think cuma Zuls and Syah je yang takde masalah masa tu..). I was confused (wondering if I should leave N*ST and jump over to TV*3), Jots was unhappy about someone who made life hell for her in the office, and Nels had his own personal issues to deal with. But we still could manage some laughs during the buka session.. and it was nice.. You feel belonged. In a small, cosy, group.

Now, things are a bit different. Syah and I are always with Fairuz, Umar, Anis, Nik, Sueriyani and Suza*nna. The group's bigger and it was always so much fun lepak-ing with them. But I guess, it's somewhat 'less personal'.

We're close, but not to the extent of sharing our dreams, fears and hopes. Most of the time, I don't know what half of the group is up to. Or how he or she feels.

But I guess, that's best kot. We're cool hanging out together, but we don't get personal. I mean, there are some people in the group whom I'm beginning to get close to, but I still keep my distance sometimes.

I guess. I just don't want to get hurt. When you care so much about someone and when he or she (intentionally or unintentionally) hurt you, it could make you go crazy.

The best is to remain impersonal. To be nice to everyone and to enjoy their company, yet not put too much hope that they will be with you always.

Ntah lah. I miss the friends I've made in N*ST.. This is a special tribute to them:
Brenda: Ayo.. girl.. Ip*oh isn't too far from KL. But it's been ages since I last saw you. I miss your laugh.
Debs: Hey.. Putra*jaya is even closer! How come we never meet? Remember how you always give me that knowing look? Heheh..
Shar*m & Jas*bir: Ha.. ni lagi satu. Selalu berjanji nak berjumpa, but it never materialise. We kept making empty promises to catch up with one another, but...? I miss your hug, Shar*mie.. and I miss your 'advice', Jasb*ir.
Nels: Hmmm.. busy huh? Want you to know that my prayers are with you always.
Zuls: Your M*BA's keeping you real busy, kan? But I want you to know that I'm always praying for your success.
Shan*kar: Dude! Do I have to wait for another wedding to see you? Hehehe.. I miss your jokes. I do.
Chow: Heheh.. I know you sit near me and you still talk to me and all.. But it's been awhile since we even go down for tea. Remember how dear Cal*vin would call you bila dia cari I nak bagi assignment? Hehhehe..
Patr*ick: Hey handsome. I hardly see you this days. Miss your cheeky smile... Dah lama kita tak turun for tea, kan?
Jots: At least, kita not so bad lah kan? I'm glad we can still talk and laugh like we used to each time we're together. I want you to know that you'll always have me.. :-)

Hmmmm.. wonder if I would make the same tributes to my 'new-found-friends' next year..