2004: The year that was..
It was quite a challenging year for me. I got ‘dumped’ by someone yang ‘kononnya’ loved me ever since I joined N*ST (hmmmph!), I lost some good friends, I was back-stabbed and I failed to accomplish some resolutions that I set early this year.
But I think I’m more matured now.. After all, experiences (good and bad) are supposed to make you a better person, kan?
These are the top 10 things that I’ve learned in 2004:
1. Men can tell you they ‘love you’ today and forget all about it the next day. They can even make love to you in the evening and go out for dinner with another girl just hours later.
2. Friendship is very volatile. You can lose a friend anytime. Say the wrong things and your friendship can go down the drain.
3. When a friendship turns sour, not everyone is willing to forgive you and accept you as a friend again. I lost a few good friends this year. Luckily, some are willing to take me back into their lives and we’re now trying to rekindle the friendship. But there’s this one girl-friend who still refuses to talk to me. I tried to make amends, tapi dia tak layan pun. Yang peliknya, I don’t even know why she’s angry at me in the first place. Sigh.
4. Don’t lead a person on when you don’t have any intentions of starting a relationship with the person. It’s just not nice.
5. Watch your back cuz anyone can stab you from the back. Not everyone thinks you’re a nice person and some wouldn’t think twice to calling you a ‘bit*ch’.
6. There are some people who will just take you for granted. Must learn to put your foot down.
7. People change, whether you are ready for the changes or not. Learn to accept the changes.
8. When you like someone, don’t assume that he or she will like you back. Sometimes, even them being nice and smiley in front of you are not indications that they’re willing to be your friend.
9. Lovers come and lovers go. Lovers get replaced.
10. Watch who you tell your stories and secrets to. Not everyone is interested to hearing your tales. Plus, not everyone can keep his or her mouth shut.
But 2004 ain’t all that bad. I think I’ve understood a little more on love, friendship and life this year..
Syah, for one, was a surprise. I never thought our friendship would last when he left N*ST. Maklum lah.. working for an important person and earning more and all.. who needs a friend like me? But he’s been wonderful and our friendship has never been stronger. Heck, I think I can tell him everything now and know that he will never be judgmental of me. Of course, kekadang tu, he irritates the hell out of me lah kan.. but at the end of the day, when things go wrong, I know I can turn around and depend on him. Thanks nyah, for being so wonderful. :-)
I’m also beginning to learn the term: ‘letting go’. For almost three years since I broke up with someone I have not been able to ‘accept’ anyone into my life. I was still clinging on to the hopes that he will come back to me. But now I know that not all things are reversible. And yes, love dies. And now that I’ve realised this, I feel ‘lighter’.. like a huge burden off my shoulders. And while I’m not so ready to ‘fall for another’ again, I’m not bitter anymore. Heck, it’s alright if he stopped loving me. Cinta tak boleh dipaksa kan?
I learnt the deaf sign language and that was a real eye-opener. It reminded me to ‘bersyukur’ selalu for all the blessings that God has given me. So yeah.. I’m kinda ‘deformed’, but hey, at least I can walk and talk and I have a brain that works (I think.. heheh).
All in all, 2004 was not a really bad year. I got to cover the general elections (and that was such a good experience!), made new friends kat my sign-language class, got transferred to a desk that I like (plus I have a fabulous boss), lost my wallet and FOUND it back, managed to travel quite a bit (went to Penang, Kedah, Johor, Medan, Terengganu, Australia, Pahang, Melaka, Lumut, Kuantan and Singapore) and got close to a bunch of nice people from the office (Fair*uz, Nik, An*is, Suz*anna, Han*api, Uma*r and Sue Da*lip).
I’ve had my fair share of orgasms for the year (ooh la la) and I have lovely people who constantly make me smile.. (Syah, Zuls, Sabbs, Ahmad, Ham, Pari, Fred, Em, Leila, Zelle, Jots, Nels, Lyna, Ruth, Syuk, Emilyn, Thane, Alang, Aisyah, Vins, Ghanesh, Maran, my favourite Michael, Chow, Chelvy, Sumi, Suzie, Norman, Sushma, Vicky, Ravi.. ayo.. the list just doesn’t stop here, kan.. hehe..)
Thank you God, for a lovely 2004. May next year be filled with more love and joy.
Of bLOgGiNg anD bEiNg oN LeAVe..
I’ve not been blogging kan? Bukan apa.. saja je.. M-A-L-A-S. Heh heh.
I was on a ten-day leave and banyak sangat benda nak buat sampai malas nak blog.
Tapi nak jugak cakap..
- the slumber party kat Gran*d May*a Hotel with Zelle, Lyna and Suzi last Wednesday best sesangat! Macam an episode from sex-and-the-city pulak.. hehe. So okay lah.. we were four good friends with a common problem - men - but it was good sharing our stories and learning from each other. The three of them are indeed, really beautiful women. They’re not only good looking and have great personality, but are very strong in facing the many challenges of life. I’m so inspired by them. Life’s a bitch, but the challenge lies in turning everything bad to good. I’m so proud to be their friend. Thank you babes, for a lovely night. I know we were all feeling crummy inside malam tu (with swollen eyes, bleeding hearts and all), but we still managed to laugh, didn’t we? And whether you guys realise it or not, it was that night that I decided to take charge of my life and let go of a certain person. For good. *smiles*
- it was fun pergi gym dengan si nyah yang sorang tu cuz we tried out so many new things (thanks for the passes, darling). And I tellya.. nothing beats going shopping with a gay friend. We can shop till we drop (without having him complaining about it) and have him carry all our shopping bags! Hehe.. glorious!
- I threaded my eyebrows and upper lips. I cried.. (sakit siot), but thank God for friends who held my hands throughout the ordeal. Hehe..bak kata Lyna ‘at least, we are perempuan betul now.. all the unwanted hair are GONE..’ Hmm.. the things GIRLS do! *wink*
- I had fun with my cousins on Saturday. Hasif, Hilda and Haiqal came over, so we watched ‘Pol*ar Exp*ress’ kat the 3D I*max theatre. Cousins can really take your breath away (literally)… hehehehe..
- And yes, it was fun to finally be able to hang out with Jots, Syah and Nels. We had Mc*Ds kat Ra*wang and that was good too. I miss ‘us’ being together. And what made it even more memorable was the fact that we knew we can count on eachother through good and bad times. Sweetheart, I know you’re gonna go through a rough time ahead. But trust me, WE will be there to support you and to hold your hand when you need it. Don’t lose faith in us, okay? Our friendship has survived the trials and tribulations, and we will not disappoint you this time. I give you my word.
Otherwise, I banyak lepak kat depan TV je. Hehe.. and I didn’t do any work at all.. So right now, I have a gazillion stories to do.. the TEK*AD story, the Orang As*li author, TC*HT’s Fren*ch chef, Sal*sa competitions, management retreat, Marl*ia Mu*sa interview, medical degree story.. sigh.. sigh.. sigh..
On a lighter note, I’m looking forward to the New Year party kat rumah ‘ratu’. Hahah… I just luuurrrve sleepovers.. smiles.
NAk jUgAK bLOg NiH..
In the newspapers:
Top stories of the week:
(Don’t even ask why I’m giving my two-cents worth on these issues.. hehehe…)
How could you rape a nine-year-old?
Oh.. that was a damper to my ‘on-leave’ mood. For the life of me, I can’t imagine a ‘sane’ person raping a young girl. Heck, budak tu, breasts pun takde. In fact, if you cut her hair really short and dressed her in a boy’s suit, you wouldn’t be able to tell if she’s a girl or a boy! On top of that, I also came across a story about a couple who ‘molested’ a young girl. Apparently, the husband suruh the wife hold the girl while he performed the oral on her. Like hello mister, budak tu, pub*ic hair pun mungkin takde lagi. What thrill can you get from licking a young girl who doesn’t even have breasts and pub*ic hair? Lagi pening kepala, the couple kononnya ada a ten-year-old girl of their own..
I shudder to think lah.. sigh.. How am I ever gonna raise my daughter in such a disgusting society? Now all I can do is pray that my lovely daughter will have a nice, safe and happy childhood.. like I did.. :-)
Sayang.. I want you to experience sex the right way. I will do my best to protect you so that you understand that it’s only YOU who have the right to decide when is the right time ‘to be with a man’. Give yourself ONLY when you want to. Only when you are ready. And when that happens, I want you to feel loved.. to have him kiss your pain away and whisper comforting words as he enters you for the first time. I want him to cuddle you after that, and hold you like you’re the most precious thing in the world. A man should protect you, not hurt you. Occasionally, you’ll meet someone who will break your heart.. but that is only God’s way of making you become a stronger woman (emotionally). When you can control your emotions, then only you can control your life, sayang. So yes.. learn from your experiences with those jerks. They will make you become a better person..
The earthquake..
Thank God Mr President dah balik dari Ko*h Sa*mui and Ph*uket when the tragedy struck semalam. Phew.. God is great..
The footballer and his jilted bride..
At least, he had the guts to call off the wedding! Imagine marrying someone you don’t love and TRYING to make it work. When there is hesitation, it’s best to not go ahead with the plan. Marriage is no game. At least now, the girl will suffer humiliation and heart break lah. But who knows, there’s a man out there who will take care of her and love her more than this silly footballer ever did! Everything happens for a reason, kan?
Hmmm.. okay lah. Dah penat nak blog. It’s time to go to sleep. Esok kena pergi kerja.. Shucks!
Ps./ Dearest Michael.. Happy birthday! Semoga panjang umur, murah rezeki dan bahagia selalu… smiles..
It was quite a challenging year for me. I got ‘dumped’ by someone yang ‘kononnya’ loved me ever since I joined N*ST (hmmmph!), I lost some good friends, I was back-stabbed and I failed to accomplish some resolutions that I set early this year.
But I think I’m more matured now.. After all, experiences (good and bad) are supposed to make you a better person, kan?
These are the top 10 things that I’ve learned in 2004:
1. Men can tell you they ‘love you’ today and forget all about it the next day. They can even make love to you in the evening and go out for dinner with another girl just hours later.
2. Friendship is very volatile. You can lose a friend anytime. Say the wrong things and your friendship can go down the drain.
3. When a friendship turns sour, not everyone is willing to forgive you and accept you as a friend again. I lost a few good friends this year. Luckily, some are willing to take me back into their lives and we’re now trying to rekindle the friendship. But there’s this one girl-friend who still refuses to talk to me. I tried to make amends, tapi dia tak layan pun. Yang peliknya, I don’t even know why she’s angry at me in the first place. Sigh.
4. Don’t lead a person on when you don’t have any intentions of starting a relationship with the person. It’s just not nice.
5. Watch your back cuz anyone can stab you from the back. Not everyone thinks you’re a nice person and some wouldn’t think twice to calling you a ‘bit*ch’.
6. There are some people who will just take you for granted. Must learn to put your foot down.
7. People change, whether you are ready for the changes or not. Learn to accept the changes.
8. When you like someone, don’t assume that he or she will like you back. Sometimes, even them being nice and smiley in front of you are not indications that they’re willing to be your friend.
9. Lovers come and lovers go. Lovers get replaced.
10. Watch who you tell your stories and secrets to. Not everyone is interested to hearing your tales. Plus, not everyone can keep his or her mouth shut.
But 2004 ain’t all that bad. I think I’ve understood a little more on love, friendship and life this year..
Syah, for one, was a surprise. I never thought our friendship would last when he left N*ST. Maklum lah.. working for an important person and earning more and all.. who needs a friend like me? But he’s been wonderful and our friendship has never been stronger. Heck, I think I can tell him everything now and know that he will never be judgmental of me. Of course, kekadang tu, he irritates the hell out of me lah kan.. but at the end of the day, when things go wrong, I know I can turn around and depend on him. Thanks nyah, for being so wonderful. :-)
I’m also beginning to learn the term: ‘letting go’. For almost three years since I broke up with someone I have not been able to ‘accept’ anyone into my life. I was still clinging on to the hopes that he will come back to me. But now I know that not all things are reversible. And yes, love dies. And now that I’ve realised this, I feel ‘lighter’.. like a huge burden off my shoulders. And while I’m not so ready to ‘fall for another’ again, I’m not bitter anymore. Heck, it’s alright if he stopped loving me. Cinta tak boleh dipaksa kan?
I learnt the deaf sign language and that was a real eye-opener. It reminded me to ‘bersyukur’ selalu for all the blessings that God has given me. So yeah.. I’m kinda ‘deformed’, but hey, at least I can walk and talk and I have a brain that works (I think.. heheh).
All in all, 2004 was not a really bad year. I got to cover the general elections (and that was such a good experience!), made new friends kat my sign-language class, got transferred to a desk that I like (plus I have a fabulous boss), lost my wallet and FOUND it back, managed to travel quite a bit (went to Penang, Kedah, Johor, Medan, Terengganu, Australia, Pahang, Melaka, Lumut, Kuantan and Singapore) and got close to a bunch of nice people from the office (Fair*uz, Nik, An*is, Suz*anna, Han*api, Uma*r and Sue Da*lip).
I’ve had my fair share of orgasms for the year (ooh la la) and I have lovely people who constantly make me smile.. (Syah, Zuls, Sabbs, Ahmad, Ham, Pari, Fred, Em, Leila, Zelle, Jots, Nels, Lyna, Ruth, Syuk, Emilyn, Thane, Alang, Aisyah, Vins, Ghanesh, Maran, my favourite Michael, Chow, Chelvy, Sumi, Suzie, Norman, Sushma, Vicky, Ravi.. ayo.. the list just doesn’t stop here, kan.. hehe..)
Thank you God, for a lovely 2004. May next year be filled with more love and joy.
Of bLOgGiNg anD bEiNg oN LeAVe..
I’ve not been blogging kan? Bukan apa.. saja je.. M-A-L-A-S. Heh heh.
I was on a ten-day leave and banyak sangat benda nak buat sampai malas nak blog.
Tapi nak jugak cakap..
- the slumber party kat Gran*d May*a Hotel with Zelle, Lyna and Suzi last Wednesday best sesangat! Macam an episode from sex-and-the-city pulak.. hehe. So okay lah.. we were four good friends with a common problem - men - but it was good sharing our stories and learning from each other. The three of them are indeed, really beautiful women. They’re not only good looking and have great personality, but are very strong in facing the many challenges of life. I’m so inspired by them. Life’s a bitch, but the challenge lies in turning everything bad to good. I’m so proud to be their friend. Thank you babes, for a lovely night. I know we were all feeling crummy inside malam tu (with swollen eyes, bleeding hearts and all), but we still managed to laugh, didn’t we? And whether you guys realise it or not, it was that night that I decided to take charge of my life and let go of a certain person. For good. *smiles*
- it was fun pergi gym dengan si nyah yang sorang tu cuz we tried out so many new things (thanks for the passes, darling). And I tellya.. nothing beats going shopping with a gay friend. We can shop till we drop (without having him complaining about it) and have him carry all our shopping bags! Hehe.. glorious!
- I threaded my eyebrows and upper lips. I cried.. (sakit siot), but thank God for friends who held my hands throughout the ordeal. Hehe..bak kata Lyna ‘at least, we are perempuan betul now.. all the unwanted hair are GONE..’ Hmm.. the things GIRLS do! *wink*
- I had fun with my cousins on Saturday. Hasif, Hilda and Haiqal came over, so we watched ‘Pol*ar Exp*ress’ kat the 3D I*max theatre. Cousins can really take your breath away (literally)… hehehehe..
- And yes, it was fun to finally be able to hang out with Jots, Syah and Nels. We had Mc*Ds kat Ra*wang and that was good too. I miss ‘us’ being together. And what made it even more memorable was the fact that we knew we can count on eachother through good and bad times. Sweetheart, I know you’re gonna go through a rough time ahead. But trust me, WE will be there to support you and to hold your hand when you need it. Don’t lose faith in us, okay? Our friendship has survived the trials and tribulations, and we will not disappoint you this time. I give you my word.
Otherwise, I banyak lepak kat depan TV je. Hehe.. and I didn’t do any work at all.. So right now, I have a gazillion stories to do.. the TEK*AD story, the Orang As*li author, TC*HT’s Fren*ch chef, Sal*sa competitions, management retreat, Marl*ia Mu*sa interview, medical degree story.. sigh.. sigh.. sigh..
On a lighter note, I’m looking forward to the New Year party kat rumah ‘ratu’. Hahah… I just luuurrrve sleepovers.. smiles.
NAk jUgAK bLOg NiH..
In the newspapers:
Top stories of the week:
(Don’t even ask why I’m giving my two-cents worth on these issues.. hehehe…)
How could you rape a nine-year-old?
Oh.. that was a damper to my ‘on-leave’ mood. For the life of me, I can’t imagine a ‘sane’ person raping a young girl. Heck, budak tu, breasts pun takde. In fact, if you cut her hair really short and dressed her in a boy’s suit, you wouldn’t be able to tell if she’s a girl or a boy! On top of that, I also came across a story about a couple who ‘molested’ a young girl. Apparently, the husband suruh the wife hold the girl while he performed the oral on her. Like hello mister, budak tu, pub*ic hair pun mungkin takde lagi. What thrill can you get from licking a young girl who doesn’t even have breasts and pub*ic hair? Lagi pening kepala, the couple kononnya ada a ten-year-old girl of their own..
I shudder to think lah.. sigh.. How am I ever gonna raise my daughter in such a disgusting society? Now all I can do is pray that my lovely daughter will have a nice, safe and happy childhood.. like I did.. :-)
Sayang.. I want you to experience sex the right way. I will do my best to protect you so that you understand that it’s only YOU who have the right to decide when is the right time ‘to be with a man’. Give yourself ONLY when you want to. Only when you are ready. And when that happens, I want you to feel loved.. to have him kiss your pain away and whisper comforting words as he enters you for the first time. I want him to cuddle you after that, and hold you like you’re the most precious thing in the world. A man should protect you, not hurt you. Occasionally, you’ll meet someone who will break your heart.. but that is only God’s way of making you become a stronger woman (emotionally). When you can control your emotions, then only you can control your life, sayang. So yes.. learn from your experiences with those jerks. They will make you become a better person..
The earthquake..
Thank God Mr President dah balik dari Ko*h Sa*mui and Ph*uket when the tragedy struck semalam. Phew.. God is great..
The footballer and his jilted bride..
At least, he had the guts to call off the wedding! Imagine marrying someone you don’t love and TRYING to make it work. When there is hesitation, it’s best to not go ahead with the plan. Marriage is no game. At least now, the girl will suffer humiliation and heart break lah. But who knows, there’s a man out there who will take care of her and love her more than this silly footballer ever did! Everything happens for a reason, kan?
Hmmm.. okay lah. Dah penat nak blog. It’s time to go to sleep. Esok kena pergi kerja.. Shucks!
Ps./ Dearest Michael.. Happy birthday! Semoga panjang umur, murah rezeki dan bahagia selalu… smiles..
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