Shucks!

I can't believe I'm leaving for the Bi*gApple tomorrow. I've not even packed and frankly, I'm beginning to sweat at the idea of attending the U*N assembly.

Boss made me realise that I am so not prepared to attend such an assembly. And she's right. I've not done my research, I'm clueless about issues and problems related to youth (though I'm a youth myself) and I know nothing of the U*N. I have every right to be afraid. Afraid of letting her down. Afraid of disappointing the bosses who thought I could pull this through.

Who am I kidding anyway? I am sooooo not prepared for such an event. I don't even consider myself a 'senior reporter'. Shucks. I'm in deep sh!t. Sigh.

Which is why I'm here. In the office. Trying to do some reading on the U*N. And youth problems around the world. Sigh. Wish I was at home. Sleeping. The weather's so nice to just sleep in.

Or best if I can go to the gym kan? Sigh. Just found out that I missed the deadline for "freezing" my gym membership during Rama*dhan. So I am now appealing for them to allow me to freeze my membership for Oct. I'm crossing my fingers that they will allow it. Kalau tak, rugi je bayar for the whole month, tapi tak guna.. Sigh.

On another note, Ba*li was bombed again semalam. I really don't understand the motives of these terrorists. Kalau marah sangat dengan any particular government, just bomb the government's nucleus/administration centre lah.

Why bomb Ku*ta or Jim*baran Beach? Why hurt the civilians? Why kill women, children and innocent men?

Sigh. Teringat Ku*ta and Jim*baran Beach. Ku*ta's so full of activity. So full of life, music and laughter. Jim*baran Beach is a lovely place to have dinner as you watch the sun set. It also has got a good view of planes flying in and out of the airport in Ba*li.

Why must bomb these places? When I was there a few months ago, I was told that the Balin*nese are the most gentle people. And how true. They are so warm and friendly. Why must you harm them? Already, tourism is their main source of economy. Sigh. I seriously think that these terrorists have no brains at all. When they bomb Ba*li, they will only hurt the economy further because no one would come to Ba*li lepas ni. And then there'll be unemployment and crime cases will be on the rise. Desperate times call for desperate measures kan?

So the terrorists killed a few 'mat sallehs'. And then what? Austra*lia, Bri*tain and Ameri*ca will all be "terrified" and pull out from Iraq or stop harrasing the Musl*ims in Pales*tine? MY ASS!

Sigh. Tu sebab I kata terrorists ni semua bodoh. Now it will only be more difficult for "harmless, peace-loving" Musl*ims to travel around the world. Already, I was 'singled-out' when I arrived at the airport in Per*th two months ago. And then bila nak balik, they 'picked' me out again to run some explosive tests.. kononnya takut I will be bringing some bombs on the aircraft. Yeah.. I was so-called "randomly picked" lah kan. But we all know I was picked because I have a Musl*im surname.

And I have this feeling that I will be under scrutiny again when I land in Ne*wark airport, New*York, esok.

But you know what? I don't blame them for not trusting Musl*ims. Musl*ims themselves set such bad examples these days. If they can hurt innocent civilians, what guarantee do I have that they won't hurt me?

Sheessh. I miss those days when Islam was breeding intelligent scientists and scholars. Where are the likes of Ibn*Sina, Ibn*Battuta and Uma*rAlKhayyam in this modern Musli*m world? Oh I forgot. Some of the intelligent Musl*ims out there are building bombs, so that they can destroy mankind.

Bodoh!

Thank you God, for keeping Sya*iful (my tour guide when I was in Ba*li) and his family safe. Alham*dulillah..